We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I love you. Go after that dick
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize