that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
