NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
