question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
