so that wasnt chicken after all
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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