ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize