When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
