ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
