idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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