therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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