And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
