My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize