I think I just saw someone hide a body.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I got her a Nickelback box set.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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