This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
you made out with another girl for some wings
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
