So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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