How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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