I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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