Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
