i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
