did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I have aggressive nipples.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
