she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
