stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
