We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
please come you make the beer taste better
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
