I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize