I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
