I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
