it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
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