I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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