Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
