She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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