Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
