He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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