so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
