i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
