yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize