hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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