OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Randomize
