We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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