I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize
