wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Randomize
