he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize