she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
