Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
50% drunk capacity currently
third nipple confirmed
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Randomize
