Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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