She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
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