Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
