Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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