check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
