She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize