just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
