Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
